Finality.

M
After what seemed to be the longest I've ever waited for anything, my wait has ended. I finally got my answer. I tell you man, the suspense was killing me.Y

F
Everyday, I was like ' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?' what's it gonna be?' ' what's it gonna be?'E

E
I tried to fool myself saying 'Don't think about it, don't kill yourself over it, just let it be, the answer will come in time.' But in truth subconsciously that's all I ever though about. I just had to have a second where I wasn't think about something else, and BAM! the thoughts just down came like a torrential downpour.L

I
I could be chatting with my friends, and just suddenly think about it for no apparent reason. It invaded my dreams, sometimes in a good way sometimes in a bad way. I've spent sleepless nights pondering about it, the thoughts just won't go away, maybe I actually wanted to have those thoughts.N

G
Now the wait is over, and I finally got my reply. It wasn't what I wanted but hey in life you can't always get what you want.S

F
How do I feel now?O

R
To be honest I'm not sure. I feel sad that's for sure. But I feel relieved that the wait is over as well. At least I can go on with life and not look back and ask myself 'I wonder what would have happened if I had done it?' I have no regrets in the actions that I have done. The question I have is ' Did I move too quickly? Should i have waited for more time to pass and the storm to settle?'Y

O
There are 2 ways to handle this situation.U

R
1. I could mope around a feel sorry for myself. Do stupid stuff. Feel that the world has betrayed me, and that life is not worth living. I could fall into the world of despair and be emo all the time. I could turn my back on my friends and be a social outcast.E

M
2. I could take it like a matured person and accept the decision and move on. It will be hard at first, and there will be spells of sadness, but I could fight and get back on my own 2 feet. I could harbour no ill feelings and respect the decision. Realise that I can't force the decision and that everybody has their own right to make their own decisions.A

I
I will take No. 2. Because a wise friend once told me, sadness, depression and emo-ness is addictive. Not in an obvious sense, but in the sense that people at times feel that way because they want to. Because they enjoy it. N


So, I will respect your decision and harbour no ill feelings. And friends we shall remain then.

Love is love because it isn't ordinary.

The wrong side.

I was reading an anime blog when I came upon this picture. I though it was so hilarious that I've decided to post it up as well.




This totally redefines the phrase, 'Waking up on the wrong side of the bed'.

As I quote the blogger who posted this up. I LOL'ed.

Ja-ne!!

Depature.

Okay, I'm like a week late in putting this post. But the person involved in this post is now down under so it's not like he can do anything to me. haha.

Last Monday, I lost another friend. Sad isn't. Don't worry he's still alive, instead he's now in Melbourne, Australia. Why is everyone moving away???

Christoper Thomas James Ngu *insert Chinese name*. I'm sorry I can't remember your Chinese name Chris.


He's the guy at the very right. Looking like a complete retard.

In fact he's the person who told about the upside down flag.

So after a very hectic 'getting out of school' and chasing my car. I went over to the airport with a couple of other friends to see him off.

Uhhh.... to be honest I don't really know what to talk about..... All I know is he took so many pictures till his mouth hurt from smiling so much.


The last lunch.

So Chris, hope you enjoy aussie, make new friends, stay close to God, and MAKE sure you come back when you have the chance. Haha, don't forget to come back with an Australian accent. LOL


P/s Hope you forgive me for calling you a retard. haha

Ja-ne!!

Quote of the day.

My friend told me this and I think in some ways it's really true.

'I'm glad I'm a girl because I don't have to chase girls who are ridiculously complicated and hard to understand'

So true!

'God made man first so that he may have time to mature and understand the complexities of women'.

Ja-ne!!

A week.

A week has passed since then. A week I have waited. Comments like 'why can't we just be friends?', 'I'll avoid you..haha' and 'dream on' has been said.

I do not know if they are directed at me or not. I hope not but I think so.

People say I'm paranoid I normally beg to differ, but sometimes I'm inclined to agree with them. I think to much that's why. It's easy to say, but hard to do. This is when the phrase 'easier said than done' really makes sense.

This feeling of uncertainty and not knowing is torturous. Everyday, I wonder what's going to happen. At this point I think I don't really care what the outcome is, I just would like to know the decision made. But I know deep down I wish for it to happen, but my brain tells me 'life doesn't always turn out the way you want it'.

There are things I wish to tell, not in that sense, but in the sense that I would like to explain myself. Make myself clear on my intention. But I can't do that if the conversation doesn't even occur. I do not wish to say it in a note or mail or text, I wish to say it in person.

I know I sound like some lame dude now, but as of now I can't think of a better way to do this.

Today.

Today, I overcame my fear.

Fear of rejection.
Fear of failure.
Fear of the unknown.

Today, I did what I had never done before.

Today, I felt free for the first time in ages.

Today, I said what I have been trying to say.

Today, I gained courage.

Today, I made the first move.

Today, I finally did it.

Today, I abandoned my brain.

Today, I moved before I thought.

Today, I trusted my instincts.

Today, I listenned to my heart.

Today, I started New Year Resolution 6.

Today, I took a step foward.

Today, I entered the unknown.

Today, I just did it.

Today, I did it in person.

Today, I confessed.

Today, I wait for tomorrow.

The worst song to sing at a wedding ever.

A couple months back, I attended a distance relatives weddings. Being a typical Chinese wedding, there was karaoke during the wedding. I discovered that night what the worst song to sing at a wedding was. It's 'Please release me' by Engelbert Humperdinck.

Please release me let me go
for I don't love you anymore
to waste our lives would be a sin
release me and let me love again.

I have found a new love dear
and I will always want her near
her lips are warm while your's are cold
release me my Darling let me go.

Please release me can't you see
you'd be a fool to cling to me
to live a lie would bring us pain
release me and let me love again.

I shit you not. Some actually sang this at a wedding!

Ja-ne!!

Blogs.

Blog. To me blogs are kinda like online diaries, except that people can read them. It's like a place where you can express the emotions you keep inside you. A place where you express your real feelings at times.

There are many type of blogs. There are vlogs, photoblogs, linklog, sketchblog, coparate blogs, fashion blogs, and people-who-have-a-blog-for-a-few-months-and-then-dont-use-it-and-don't-delete-it-so-other-people-can-use-the-URL-blogs.

Sometimes someone can look cheerful and happy on the outside, but in their blogs it's sadness and pain and anxieties and emo-ness. The problem is some people are really like that and some people just out it up for fun. It's because of people like this that it's getting harder to tell the truths from the lies.

Some people use blogs to say what they hate about others, because they're too chicken to confront them themselves. Some people just have blogs because everybody is having one. Some people use their blogs to confess and break-up with others.

There are those who just blog about their life, and there are those whose blog is their life.

What I'm trying to say here is, blogs represent a part of ourselves, sometimes a part we don't usually show people. It's a place where we say things we don't say out loud for fear we ruin the image others have of us. To some, their blog is like their sanctuary. A place of peace, warmth and familiarity.

Until....... A certain group of people come. They are called parents.

Do you have any idea how weird to know that your parents is reading your blog? It's like when you have your friends over, and you parents suddenly enter the room. Everybody becomes quite and there is this tense atmosphere in the room. Your friends now talk in whispers and your parent are attempting to make nice conversation with your friends. Your friends are suddenly polite and speak with manners.

Same thing with blogs. I now have to be careful on what I post and how I post it. I can't talk about things I normally would. It's just weird.

I know a blog can be read by anybody, but can't it be it can be read by anybody except your own parents? I'm probably in a lot trouble for posting this but whatever.


Ja-ne!!

Free satay

Free satay anyone?



Now that's cheap.

Ja-ne!!

Sandwish anyone?

I was eating lunch today when I saw this.



I want a chicken sandwish please, can I make a wich as well?


Ja-ne!!

Make in where??

Quite a while back I saw this.



2 things.
One. Bad English.
Two. Our sim cards are now make in japan?
I though everything was make in China... (the mistakes are there on purpose)

Ja-ne!!

Partly or skimmed?

My sister bought a carton of milk the other day and the label really interested me.


Partly.....??

What that suppose to mean? There's milk then there's skimmed milk. Is partly skimmed milk suppose to be in between?

As far as I know people generally drink skimmed milk cause they don't want to gain weight. Which I find quite ridicules because skimmed milk is pretty much tasteless. So you might just as well drink water.

And for people who couldn't care any less like me, we drink milk. Then we exercise to lose the weight.

So who would drink PARTLY skimmed milk?

People who want to taste milk be not gain so much weight? Or people who want the calcium? Or suckers like me who buy it just for the sake of trying it out?

Honestly thought it did taste pretty good.

Ja-ne!!

Cat Shampoo.

Iwas at a supermarket the other day and saw this.





Cat shampoo??

Last I checked cat's didn't like getting wet. So why on earth would you sell cat shampoo??

This is not Beverly Hills, where pets are given the royal treatment with all the pedicures and manicures and whatevercures they have.

I know we're called Kuching but seriously people.........

Who would be dumb enough to attempt to shower their cat?

Ja-ne!!

2010

Hello everyone. Happy New Year to you all. We now have entered the second decade of the millennium. 10 years ago, I was just about to start primary one and now I have my SPM. How time flies eh?

It is now the year 2010. the 1st of January in fact. 10110 looks like some sort computer stuff.

Here are my resolution for this year. I'm putting this up more for my benefit so I don't forget more than anything else.

2010 New Year Resolutions.

1) Study hard and do well in SPM.
2) Go to the gym REGULARLY.
3) Kickass in this years band competition.
4) Stop using Facebook purely for its' applications.
5) Stop eating supper unnecessary.
6) Settle THE issue.
7) Get a rough idea on what I want to do in the future.
8) Keep a planner, and actually use it.
9) Clean my room more than twice a year.
10) Do resolution number 6.

So here they are. Wish me good luck in doing them. Especially number 6 and 10.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!

Ja-ne!!